Hello 2022….

This past year has been one of the longest yet fastest years of my life… it’s been one of the best but most stressful years… but I got something from it that I wouldn’t change for the world.

Think the biggest thing is I became a mum this year. I now get to watch my beautiful brilliant daughter grow up each and every day. And that’s everything I feel I will ever need!

But having a baby in a pandemic is tough. It tests so much of your strength, relationships and mental stability.

I feel guilt on a daily basis for what my daughter has missed out on due to this pandemic, but I have to remind myself that she wouldn’t be who she is if she was born in any other time.

This year has had health worries, relationship troubles and plenty of financial stress! Turns out a hyphenated name is enough to confuse the child benefit people!

But one thing I’ve learnt is I need to stop looking back. I need to look to the future and try to be the best mummy and person I can be moving forwards.

Nothing can change the past, but I can do all I can to better myself for the future.

So 2022 will be the year that I try to be more open and present. I want to get more creative with things I do with my daughter and want to push myself out of my comfort zone to benefit her.

I’ve barely taken her out alone, just me and her, due to fear of not coping. I have so many doubts in myself as a mother, but I need to learn to manage this!

On days it’s just me and her I want to get out to baby groups, I want her to socialise so she doesn’t have the anxiety I have around new people.

I want us to have mummy daughter days exploring, and doing new activities.

I want to make memories.

Part of the way to better myself is to get in a healthier routine. I’m not going to be making any massive changes- that’s just unrealistic.

I want to start getting up and ready in the mornings. Even if it’s having breakfast and putting on clean jammies!

Currently I always get little lady fed and dressed. I have a habit staying in my jammies, eating junk food and drinking coke.

My hope is that getting out more will help like this.

And finally I want to be sticking with little ones swimming lessons. I signed her up back when she was 7 months old. We went for a couple of months and then from mid September it was one thing after another stopping us going. It got to a point I was looking for excuses.

It comes down to my fear of socialising and people I don’t know I think, but either way I need to stick with it. Both because of financial reasons and for her benefit.

So those are my very simple aims for the year. I may do a books goals post later but at this point I’m not sure.

What are you hoping to get from the year of 2022?

Make sure to be following my Instagram for lots of photos of little lady and a sneak peak before I do her introduction post!

And I’ve just joined TikTok, I’m sure I’m going to embarrass myself but here ya go…. Alexmariephillips


Am I really back?!

Well to say it’s been a long time would be an almighty understatement. Well over a year to my calculations….

When I was last here I mentioned that I had a hell of a lot of stress going on. I had secrets I was still keeping to myself, too scared to announce. I had major life changes, some by choice and some being forced upon me. And I had the constant worry of having to not only look after myself, but the baby I was carrying…

Although I had written about my journey trying to conceive I never formally announced on here that I had fallen pregnant. It was one almighty shock for both myself and my partner, but it was just what we needed at that time.

The pregnancy was rough in so many ways, but after being told I couldn’t carry a child that was nothing we weren’t expecting.

And although I now have the most gorgeous baby daughter, the last year or so has definitely left me with some mental scars.

I have missed blogging so much. For a long time it’s been an outlet and a comfort to me. And now, as my baby girl is approaching one, I feel like I’m now ready to come back.

So what’s for the future?

Well quite simply, I’m not completely sure. My content will most definitely be different. I’m a mum now, that has quickly become my main focus and a major part of my life. So obviously my content will reflect that. There will be more family, baby and mummy content. I want to share my experiences to both educate and show mums that they aren’t alone- as that’s something I’ve felt a lot over this time. And I want to share products and brands that I adore!

I’m hoping to still share bookish content as well. For the time being I’m not going to be working with any publishers, as the reality is I just don’t have the time that I once did. But as little lady gets older and more independent, I hope to find time to read a bit here and there and be able to share that with you.

To be perfectly honest I’ve not finished a book since she’s been born- unless you count kids bedtime stories!!

So what would everyone like to see?

I plan on doing some story times of what’s gone on, and definitely plan on introducing my little lady a little more.

I recommend following my Instagram as that’s about the only place I’ve stayed active over this time- alexmariephillips