I started my degree with the Open University four years ago now, and yet I’m still only on my second year out of a six year course.

When I originally signed up with the Open University I was doing a Classical Studies degree, which is what I thought I truly wanted to do, but when I started the second year I realised that it really wasn’t. Thankfully they are so nice, that I was able to switch my degree across to an Open degree meaning I could study anything I wanted each year, that’s what I’m still working towards.

So, why is it taking me three attempts? 

If you have followed the blog for a little while, then you will be aware that it has not been an easy ride. Almost two years ago now, I lost Grandad, and my parents split up. Both of these things hit me hard, and grief was not an easy concept for me to grasp as I was going through it. For a while, I tried to maintain my study at the same time and to be quite honest, I just found that it all got too much. In the end, I had to leave work and study, to take the time to get used to the new situation and manage my own mental health. Turns out I really didn’t like the unit either.
I thought that this helped a lot, so I restarted (although a different unit) the following October. All I hadn’t taken into consideration was that in the time between ending the previous unit and then starting the next, I had been diagnosed with ME and Fibromyalgia, so was therefore on very strong pain relief.

After about five months, and three extensions, I realised that the Tramadol was having a serious effect of my ability to focus and absorb any information. I also had several issues with very not understanding tutors who seemed to think that chronic pain and fatigue wasn’t a thing that could affect someone’s day to day life. So in the end, I was left with no choice but to walk away from studying for another year. 
That leads me to now. I am about to restart the same unit as last year again in October. This time I feel a lot more prepared, I have a great support system all around me, and am really excited for it. Over the summer I had been meaning to complete one of their free courses in Creative Writing. I will definitely be picking that up at some point again and let you all now how I found it.

But in the next month before my course starts, I will be trying to get myself prepped. The idea is for me to create a study plan, doing some reading early, and start to establish a routine.

Are you going back to university? What difficulties have you found with studying?

Well I have been saying that I want to mix up my content lately, and I thought this one would be a bit of a change. I have always been a music fan, but with the summer weather, and a quite a few long car journeys with my partner, we have been having some really amazing singing duets!

My top album for this has to be Badlands by Halsey. I have been listening to this for several months now and I must know all the words to everything apart from Drive. You may not of heard of this album, as it is not allowed to be played on the Radio due to the amount of bad language and some of the general themes in the lyrics. This aside, I love these songs and I just feel like I can relate to a lot of them.

‘I think there’s a flaw in my code
These voices won’t leave me alone’ Gasoline 

For the last few months, I have had many of the songs from Anne-Marie’s Speak Your Mind Deluxe album. The radio has butchered the remix of Friends though, I understand that they have to take out the swearing but for me, by just taking out a whole section, has left the song lacking something. For some reason this has really be frustrating me. Three best songs from this album are easily, 2002, Friends and Ciao Adios. This just feels like a perfect summer album to me.

‘F-R-I-E-N-D-S
That’s how you fucking spell “friends”‘ FriendsI know I said that this was going to be go to albums, but I have to mention this one song. To begin I had only heard it on tv during adverts, but then found the actual song on deezer, and that song is Leave a Light On by Tom Walker. Once again, the radio remix, which has upped the tempo, put in more base, and just added a very odd vocal to it, has completely butchered the original. If you want a beautiful song, with powerful lyrics and just something to make you smile, then definitely search for the original of this song.

‘If you look into the distance, there’s a house upon the hill
Guiding like a lighthouse it’s a place where you’ll be
Safe to feel our grace ’cause we’ve all made mistakes’ Leave a Light OnMy fourth and final album for this list is One More Light by Linkin Park. When this came out last year I was really not very sure about it, but since seeing it live before Chester sadly passed away, and then listening to it many many more times, I would now be lost without this album. Its one of those that really rocks the emotions inside you, and can leave you feeling both broken and empowered all at the same time.

‘Sharp edges have consequences, I
Guess that I had to find out for myself
Sharp edges have consequences, now
Every scar is a story I can tell’ Sharp Edges

So that is it for my first list of go to albums/songs. I think this is a blog post that I will do a new edition of every quarter or so, let me know what you think and what you’d like to see in the future on the blog.

What are your current go to albums?

Here are just a handful of the other songs that I have regularly been turning on to listen to this past few months.

If you have me on twitter than you will probably of noticed that Ive had a new four legged friend around lately. Throughout much of December we were visiting dog shelters trying to find one who we felt we could help and could become a member of our family. We found that in my gorgeous boy Barney, who has quickly become my shadow and best friend.
Myself and my Dad have had dogs all our live, so shortly after losing my Star last December 6th, it felt very empty in our home. Therefore we thought it was time to look at rescuing another dog that was in need of a loving home.

We contacted several charities, Dogs Trust, Luna, and PPBC. As Star was deaf, we felt that we would like to rescue another dog that maybe needed some extra work again as I have the time to do it and the skills from working with previous dogs. To begin with we thought we were going to get a border collie cross from Dogs Trust, but on one of the final visits this all fell through (I’ll have a post up about that at a later date).

In the end I fell in love with my Barney from PPBC. He is again a border collie, but is very oddly marked, being a tricolour who is predominantly brown. But at 6years old, 7 on 23rd of July, he is an amazingly trained, calm and affectionate boy. He’s only issues are that he is very reactive so barks a lot at shadows or cars going past; as well as not liking other dogs. Im working with him on both of these.

Back in March when he arrived here, he was a super timid, very unsure of him self character; but time and attention has turned him into a hyper little hooligan at times. I just cant help but love him. He leaves the rodents alone, tells me when he needs to pee, and generally just follows me around on a daily basis. By far his favourite toy is his tennis ball, well to be fair he doesn’t seem to really understand how to play with any other toy- so of course I’ve stocked him up with loads of tennis balls. Although he still has access to my old dogs toys, as I just cant part with them.

I am hoping to mention he more in future posts as his training continues, but for now I thought I’d just give you a quick introduction. Anything you’d like to ask Barney?

I have been a big fanatic of candles for many years now, mostly in the form of Yankee candles. Recently though, I have started to prefer wax melts to actual candles, they just give so much of a better smell and I just think they look so pretty. Before finding Pick’n’Melt, I had only ever used the Yankee Wax Melt Tarts, but I find them frustrating as I have to break off an amount and then try not to let the rest crumble all of the place. Not to mention the price.

From twitter, I had seen Pick’n’Melt offered a wide range of different scents so this sparked my interest in having a look at their range. I was pleased to find that not only do they have 350, yes three hundred and fifty, didn’t scents to choose from, but that you can make your own selection to get the perfect mix of scents.

Personally, each of the melts were about one usage for me, as I had them alight for the entire day (about 8 hours) at a time. This is perfect for me as I like to mix it up, something different each day so that I constantly appreciate it. They were super easy to just pop out and put in the melting device, and then after the smell had finished, I could scope up the solidified wax just using a spoon.

I ordered, Sandalwood, Raspberry, Cola Cubes, Tobacco and Black Coffee. I loved each and every one. Sandalwood was by far my favourite, it honestly smelt just like my Granddad who I miss dearly, the smell was so comforting. It had me so content to just snuggle up with a blanket and my book. The raspberry and colour cubes, I found were perfect scents for me to work on the blog. Sweet fresh smells just have me very focused for some reason, definitely think I need to test out some more.

The Tobacco and black coffee I had alight while I was not very well, and it again was such a comforting smell, like being in a coffee shop and the cigars my partner smokes. But I do have to admit this is the only one that didn’t smell like it was meant to before burning, however as soon as I had a tealight under it, it was exactly like you’d imagine.

This is not a sponsored post, I have written this just off of my own love of their products. I have had to hold off of a new order because of moving, but I will be doing an order as soon as Ive moved (probably before this goes out), and will then give you a review of what thought on those scents.

Why not go and check out their range for yourself, I’m pretty certain there’s something there for everyone.

So finally I can talk about the big thing that has been looming over me the past couple of months- I am moving again. Its really a bit of a long story as to why we are having to move, which I’ll explain in a moment, but to be fair I am actually reasonably excited about this one. We are moving yet again further north and closer to both my own and my fathers partners; and again moving to a village which has me very happy. 
Back in January, me and my Dad signed a five year tenancy agreement to stay in the house that we are currently renting, though this time without the estate agent and just direct with the landlord. We had settled here, and my new dog has finally come out of his shell in this house, so we saw no reason to move. But at the beginning of May we started getting phone calls about rent arrears from the estate agent. We thought this very odd as we were in the belief that our agreement with them had then ended.

After several phone calls, we worked out that our landlord had actually not stopped the agreement with the estate agents, and therefore we now had TWO live contracts. This was very scary as of course we were now being expected to pay the rent twice for just the one house. We went on to talk to lawyers and citizens advice, sending them copies of the contracts etc, and they all came to the conclusion (eventually after lots of toing and froing) that neither of the contracts were actually valid. They were both null and void for various reasons, but I wont get into the legal side of it. All I will say is, none of it was actually our fault, people just hadn’t done what they should of.

But lets get into the interesting bit, we are moving to Cambridgeshire, Little Paxton to be exact. I am so happy to be moving back into a village, as I grew up in one, and having really been enjoying living so close to a busy town centre. We’ve downsized as we just have too much space here at the moment, but it is a three storey townhouse, with plenty of space for me and my Dad to live independently. This is something we find works really well for us with my disability, on good days I can be perfectly independent as an adult, but with my Dad there to help on the days that I am bed bound.

So I am moving the 6th of July, just after this will go live, and I am currently trying to get everything ready and packed up. Well to be honest at the moment Im still going through boxes I never unpacked from last year to see if I actually want any of the stuff in them- I can tell you, most of it is going straight in the donation bag. With my partner over on the weekend and then Nan again next week, I should be ready to move without too much stress.

I will do an update once I am all moved in, and have Wifi again, as that could take a couple of days.

 

Okay, so I was going to do these every couple of months but I have fallen really behind. Therefore this is my way of catching up, and hopefully I’ll do one in early August for my June and July favourites. But I guess we will see how I actually get on with it. So following on after my last favourites post, I’m going to introduce you to the new things I have been loving.

Most of my time, lately I swear has been spent playing games on my phone. Its no secret that I love real-time games, and I have been loving the new Harry Potter mobile game. At the time of writing this I have got to Year 2, and am obsessed with it, I’m already disappointed that there are only four years. The second game is another mobile game, one very much based on the old classic phone game Snake. SnakeVSBlock is a super addictive, and competitive game, that has had me glued to my phone. I pity my poor phone battery.

As before, while I’ve been ill I have been watching quite a lot of Netflix and me and my partner have been loving some of the series. We have finished all of the comedy Uncle, and are going to need to order the final season on DVD as I just cant wait for Netflix to get up to speed. We have now moved on to Fresh Meat, something I’d seen clips of before when my Dad watched it, but had never sat and watched it. I am loving it, keep nagging my partner that we need to see each other more, just so we can binge watch it. Due to a technical error, we did also start a rewatch for both of us of Outnumbered, the BBC comedy series from ages ago.

For once, Netflix is not the only TV I have been watching. I have got myself back engrossed in EastEnders. I know, I cant help it, I’ve been spending too much time with my Nan and she has got me back into my old favourite soaps. I’ve also been watching all my normal favourites of Goldbergs, The Big Bang theory and I have been loving Young Sheldon! I can not get over just how good those children are at acting like the adult versions. And did you know that the women that played Sheldon’s mother in each of the programmes are mother and daughter?

Finally, I just need to do a shout out to Whitworth dried fruits! While not exercising, I do try and limit my calorie intake, so I have replaced a lot of junk food with fruit, or at least dried fruit. I adore their fruit shots, especially the raisin and dark chocolate ones, as well as their dried apricots.

So that’s what I’ve been loving over the spring; and I will try my hardest to be more on top of things to start doing them every other month. How was your spring?

On this blog I have been thinking that I would love to start having posts on other topics that I enjoy, and what better than Disney to start with. Ive watched so many of the Disney movies, and am really trying to finish off watching the ones I haven’t watched this year. However, I really do have my set favourites, that I can not see changing. When it comes to the Disney movies, half of what makes my favourites my favourites, is the music sound tracks. So lets get into my top 5 Disney movies. Continue reading “My top 5 favourite Disney Movies”

Okay, so I’m slightly concerned that this may be a touch of a controversial blog post. With this, I am not trying to insult anyone, or be negative about the blogging community; this blog post is purely about myself and my opinions, and what I want from my blog I guess. So, with that said, please don’t take anything I’m about to say as offensive, as its just purely about how I feel. I guess I should just get into this then.  Continue reading “Why I don’t feel like part of the Community…”

Time for another of these posts, they are really new to me still, but I really enjoy writing these as it gets me thinking back over the last couple of months with what I have been loving lately. And these last couple of months have been a really good couple of months, with lots going on. I have been out and about a little bit more, but I have also had some pretty nasty fibro symptoms that had me on bed rest for a lot of January.  Continue reading “Jan&Feb Favourites”

Dating has never been an easy concept for me with my mental health; I go mute around people that I don’t know and have full trust with. That really makes meeting new people really difficult. But I have managed it in the past by getting to know someone just from talking for an extensive period of time online. Of course this isn’t always the easiest but oh well..  Continue reading “Back to Dating”